Tuesday, May 16, 2006

the conflict was sorta solved today, but i think we shld do more than that.. meaning, we shld thrash things out and i mean every single thing. anything that we are unhappy with, afterall we have been friends for 4 years and the closest friends and yet we have to pretend. thats so not right because friends must be true. 4 years of friends and i cant just say forget abt it and i really forget about it. the point of asking you out is to solve the issue and yet all the things you say is , i dont understand, i really dont know, i know its my fault. its not going to solve the matter and we will always stay at that situation, where we never know whats in your mind. i'm sorry but i really have to say that you're so fake, even to us, lamers. theres no need for that, if theres any issue, we shld just solve it and thats the end of the problems.
but i can see that you are holding back some things.. somethings that can be brought up to talk about. and when you said that you really can't rmber, i feel that its nonsense, and pls note that, i'm trying to be as nice as possible in my tone thou at times i'm really very frustrated. can you have a mind of your own and dont try to drag anyone in and say because she's mad so you are mad.
if you're mad, then be mad and let us know. and not by saying that, because she's mad and therefore you are mad.. where did your mind go? i doubt that if theres smthing that makes you upset, you can forget abt it.. okay fine. maybe you're really gracious, but i am not. though you didnt do anything to make me hate you or detest you, but not thrashing things out and not being truthful really disgust me. We were the closest friends through out secondary school and yet, you cant be truthful and honest about your feelings. Mad? then voice it all out. dont say you dont know. dont say you cant rmber cause thats TOTAL crap. okay, say that i'm mean. say that i'm a bitch. i dont care anymore. what i want to is to get our friendship back.
because you girls are the most important bunch of ppl in my life, and of course some others lah.
and i know that poly pple can never be my bestest friend or these kinda things. i seriously enjoy the times we have when we meet up for dinner and when everyone tries to make time for it. especially even if we are so tired, we make the effort. and i'm thankful for it. 'cause you guys are my only support now..

school's bad for me.
i've got phobia of going to sch now.. but i have to go, and its a must. no choice.
anyway, my classmates are fine, except for one or so.. and i feel that i really cant rely on my classmates if theres anything.. having fun is okay.. but when trouble comes, i'm not sure. .
its okay.maybe it really takes time.
anyway, thanks dao boy, nigel and lisi for being nice..
you guys lemme realise that not all poly students suck.

thanks lots.